Sesame Soy Garlic Noodles


Cost per meal: $4
Total Cost: $20
Yield: 5 servings
Time: 30 min (20 active) + (10 inactive cook) – depending on how you cook the chicken

Rice noodles are like every other noodle, right?
No Chad, sit down and STFU. Cooking rice noodles is a bitch so you actually need to read the instructions in the preparation section. It’s not going to be our fault when you fuck this up and end up with a slimy ball of starchy nastiness.

Rice noodles don’t age well after being cooked, so put on you big boy sweatpants and get ready to do some eating. That or make it in smaller batches.


  • Baking pan / circulator / any other method for cooking chicken (or whichever protein your girlfriend will eat this week)
  • Micro planer – sorry, but your weed grinder wont work
  • Large pot


  • Chicken breast, 1.5 pounds

  • Soy sauce, 1/3 cup
  • Fish sauce, 2 tsp.
  • Rice vinegar, 2 tbsp.
  • Garlic, 3 cloves, pressed
  • Toasted sesame oil, 1 tbsp.
  • Red chili flakes, 1 tbsp.
  • Ginger, ½ inch piece, grated
  • Honey, 2 tbsp.
  • Scallions, 1 bunch, diced
  • Lime, 1 juiced

  • 2 packets of fresh rice noodles (find in the refrigerated section of the grocery store)

  • Peanuts, crushed, to garnish
  • Cilantro, diced, to garnish


1. In medium mixing bowl; combine and mix soy sauce, fish sauce, rice vinegar, pressed garlic, sesame oil, chili flakes, grated ginger, honey, scallions and lime.

2. In preferred method, cook chicken breast. We suggest using a circulator because it makes the dankest and most moist breasts of chicken. If desired, use one to two tablespoons of soy ginger sauce as marinade for cooking chicken breast in. We aren’t going to tell you how to or at what temperature to cook the chicken at because you’re an adult an should know that already.

3. Cooking rice noodles is a bitch, so don’t get all high and mighty and think you can skip reading these instructions. In a large pot, bring water to boil. Drop rice noodles in boiling water and if they do not separate on their own, use chopsticks or forks to separate noodles while cooking. Cooking will take 2-3 minutes and you should pull them out even earlier than you think you should.

4. Strain water and rinse with cold water to stop them from cooking.

5. Plate however the fuck you feel like, make it look pretty or toss it all together and eat it for the next couple days. It always comes out looking the same way.

Suggested Pairing

A white wine with a touch of acidity, Pinot Grigio would be preferred because the floral and light citrus flavors would complement the lime in the sauce. The slightly higher sugar content would help counter the acid in the ginger soy sauce and clear the palate of any residual spiciness from the red pepper. When pairing food and wine, it’s all about balancing flavors against each other.

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