Adulting

It’s Time To Give A Shit About #MeToo

Da fuq is a #MeToo?
Back in the day when you were listening to Sum 41 and going through your “it’s not a phase” phase, social activist Tarana Burke started #MeToo on MySpace. It was a way of empowering women of color through empathy. Fast forward 11 years and the movement reignited from Alyssa Milano’s tweets in the wake of Harvey Weinstein revelations. In only two months the hashtag has been used over twelve million times by women and men, gay and straight, to share their experiences as victims of sexual harassment and/or violence.

“Bro, the Pats are playing. Can we not do this right now?”
We know you’ve already thought about closing this tab in favor of more important things, like a heated debate on whether or not Tom Brady is the GOAT. That’s the problem; it’s easier to stay in your lane, claim you’re a good guy and go back to your fantasy trades rather than confronting a major social issue that will define the future. So, with that in mind let us break down what this is all about:

  • #MeToo is about bringing awareness. Millions of women and men are subjected to sexual harassment and violence.
  • #MeToo exists to promote change by initiating a discourse (state schoolers: this means conversation).
  • #MeToo calls on the self-proclaimed “good guys” to unfuck the situation by standing up.
  • #MeToo is about affirming that people are going through these experiences and making them feel like they no longer need to remain silent. There should be no guilt in being a victim.

The collective reputation of men is crashing
And it’s largely due to continued oppression and violence against women. Maybe the decline started in 1977 with Roman Polanski, or maybe the decline was inevitable due to the natural power shift in the evolution of society. No matter where it started, #MeToo is about ending the oppression and violence.

“Okay, but I literally don’t know a single person that’s been sexually harassed.”
Unlikely. Again, that’s kinda the whole point of #MeToo. Women are being harassed at an incredibly high frequency and keeping it a secret. In fact, a recent ABC News – Washington Post poll found that over 54% of American women have been subjected to unwanted and inappropriate sexual advances. This means that your mother, sister, girlfriend, coworker, whoever, has undoubtedly dealt with sexual harassment and felt like it was something they couldn’t share, which is pretty depressing, and we assume you never asked.

“This is fucked, but I’m a good guy. Catch me staying in my lane until this blows over.”
Have you ever heard the saying, “if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem”? How about, “if you aren’t with us, you’re against us?” This couldn’t be more accurate. You may not be an aggressor, but if you’re inactive about promoting change, you are indeed part of the problem.

Remaining silent because you’re clinging to the belief that, “I’m a good guy,” sends the message that sexual harassment is just something that happens. It makes that type of behavior acceptable because if it wasn’t ok, someone would have said something, right? To really become the “good guy” you must first become the bad guy and take uncomfortable actions to change the pattern. 

“Now I’m uncomfortable, are we done yet?”
To be as eloquent as possible, shit is fucked for everyone, and the only way that it will improve for humanity is to make it uncomfortable for yourself. Burying your head in the sand can’t happen and in this scenario taking action doesn’t allow you to remain anonymous. Grow a set and speak up.

Who would have ever thought that you, a capable and competent male, would struggle to voice your opinion?
When the situation presents itself, it’s going to be really fucking uncomfortable, but don’t back down. Be ready to call out your boss, brother or best friend. Regardless of who it is, make it known that you don’t stand for that type of behavior and it’s not funny, macho or acceptable. It may result in a “fucking homo” or “feminist pussy” response, but at the end of the day, do you really care what the dickhead who made a rape joke thinks?

Do you want these types of violations and those types of people (i.e., Kevin Spacey, Matt Lauer, Roman Polanski) defining our culture and our society? Do you want to raise a daughter in a country where 80% of females are subjected to workplace harassment which makes achieving their dreams more difficult?

Being a modern man means protecting those who need protection
Women, men, abled, disabled, animals, the earth – everything and everyone. Yes, we acknowledge that this is a problem initiated by males, but acknowledgment doesn’t make the problem disappear. We are here discussing this issue because we want to start a discourse of change. We didn’t invent the structure, but we did inherit it, and we do benefit from it. Watching as a group of people are consistently violated and oppressed is a total Chad move.

Note to the women reading this:
We are here, we will listen, and we will change. We understand the enormity of the situation and the dire need for change.  We promise to understand the context and implications of our actions or inactions, past, and future. We promise to call out abusers to promote change. We promise to educate our future children on multidimensional respect. We promise to do everything in our power to make the world a better place.

If you’re a victim in need of any type of support, please reach out to your local community safety network.

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